The more I learn, the more I see, the more my heart smiles but feels sore.
As a campaigner and as a project with Dementia Carer Voices I/we search and campaign for the best of understanding support, awareness, opportunities, guidance and that all should be treated with dignity and respect.
For me it's a tragedy not to know about support, help, guidance and advice that is available for people. Much of this stops my heart from mending as I look back at our journey and that of many people who write to me.
This painful loneliness and isolation we felt and the opportunities we missed hurt me to the core.
On my travels I keep meeting amazing kind people and hearing about initiatives and support available.
At the the same time I meet so many families who know nothing about the above.
It breaks my heart opportunities missed along the way that would have helped mum and myself and helped us keep crisis at bay. We are on the most part private people at heart, we keep our private matters to ourselves and often crisis is reached. I reached a crisis point myself and can tell you it's the most dreadful place to be.
We have to do all we can to keep improving care, keep promoting and signposting initiatives and support already out there in our communities locally and nationally.
For every person we let reach crisis as a society we fail them, for every one looking back like me opportunities missed are painful to look back on.
Many things were not available to us over the years and we must change that for others. As I sit today the tears are for mum and the many others who never knew, who were not heard, whose hearts are broken beyond repair and who missed vital opportunities along the way.