Sunday, 31 March 2013

Missing mum and campaigning, papering over the cracks

Missing mum and campaigning, papering over the cracks  
This has been the saddest and hardest weekend since mum passed away .Much like when I was caring for mum and campaigning during my respite hours, I am leading two separate lives .I have drive, passion and the best of reason to go out and campaign, All I witnessed mum going through over 5 years, the letters I receive and the people I have met, there is no greater reason or drive required ,and much like then I feel strong when out doing talks ,or listening or trying to reach out to other to listen. Together we where lonely in so many ways, from crowded rooms, events, talks or meetings it was always just my wee mum and me alone mostly every hour of every day ,trying to survive instead of succeed .I keep busy to keep away from how much I miss my best wee pal .Mum was always my pal but over the 5 years as needs and relationships changed she was most certainly my best pal and needed  no words to inspire ,comfort or care for me,she could do that with a knowing smile and I really miss that smile today as pain of missing my mum and the loneliness in this house & heart try to beat me into submission ,As weak as I felt so often caring for mum ,as scared as I/we where so often ,caring for mum always got us through but just sometime I feel so sad and alone and heartbroken for a mum who made it better no matter what she faced
Joan Whitelaw my magnificent kind caring mum ,I could do with that smile tonight

twitter @tommyNtour
Collecting Life Stories  ,raising awarerness
Short film shown at parliament http://tv.enterprisescreen.co.uk/watch?v=347

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