Saturday, 16 February 2013

Dementia--Love story or tragedy,Which part will you play

Love story or tragedy we all have our part to play

My mums life was built on a love story ,her love for family and care for and about all she met.Mums  love for my dad,his love for her. Growing up like many family we had  our moments but my mums love always conquered.We where always put first and at all times,mums ability to care for and about all she met was inspiring ,she was magnificent in my eyes and I miss her dearly .I was thinking about recovery yesterday,I don’t think I will ever recover from missing my mum and a big part of that ,the biggest part was all that dementia brought .My mum met my dad one day and they fell in love,so there began a love story and no matter what challenges came our way we always had love to get us through There is a pain in my heart that just wont go away and I don’t think it ever will ,it was just to hard and I felt to helpless to often .Dementia on its own can break your heart.When dad passed away 10 years ago I thought mum would die from a broken heart ,I truly did but what is cruller to die from a broken heart or not remember due to dementia the reason ,the person your heart was broken,but mum had a family and friends to care for and worry about ,she worried and cared for and about everyone and everything,so she put aside or hid her broken heart so she could give her best for all .I cant hide my broken heart ,there was to  much struggle to many days feeling helpless,to little understanding from within and towards us and in my opinion across society around and about dementia My mum like all mums and dads,like all people deserve the right to keep their  life stories closer to love stores and away from tragedies.Society has its own part to play.until we take dementia and the understanding on dementia to the wider society then veering towards tragedy will always be there,until the wider society and the people we encounter because of dementia understand the impact this illness has and their actions have on our lives then the final chapter of our lives and love stories will always be affected   
My heart smiles when I think of the people who helped keep mums love story on closer to on track against all odds during her journey with dementia ,but they where far to few but they will always have a place in my heart for helping a son and his mum get thought the best they could the down side is we encountered to many who held us back, who never engaged who only saw a wee woman with dementia and almost wrote mum off 

,My mum was never just a wee woman with dementia ,she was Joan whitelaw magnificent ,kind and caring and right  to the end her eyes shone with love she  cared more about us than many cared about her

Love story or tragedy what part will you play in the life of others

Tommy             

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