Wednesday, 3 October 2012

Long days, longer nights and missing my wee mum


I knew my mum was very ill ,in fact I feel I knew more than any doctor or anyone involved in mums care ,I had too I have spent every day of the last 5 years caring for her and witnessing all that both dementia and other health issues brought ,This confusing conversation we have around dementia is always summed up with end of life care ,but what does that mean, there is no time given no real diagnosis ,it almost feels like a get out clause .even over the last weeks when I almost pleaded for help and discussion ,it was not available I in my heart thought my mum would struggle to live till Christmas, I am still in shock over all that happened over the last weeks and with my wee mum passing away and sit each day and night trying to work it all out, the days are long and the nights feel longer without my mum by my side and all the was involved on a daily basis to care for her .
I look back at 5 years of struggle, especially in the middle when not only was my mum struggling, I as her son and carer seemed to struggle more to witness and to cope That’s why I started my campaign and that’s why I will continue ,I don’t want anyone to feel how we felt ,struggle how we struggled and sit  like I am looking back feeling let down and with regrets and I am not alone I read it in the life stories I receive and many people facing or have face greater struggles the us
I miss my mum so much sitting here today ,as she was the strength behind our struggle and our campaign and that campaign will continue and grow  
Tommy    

1 comment:

  1. My heart goes out to you Tommy. My Mum has dementia, she is older than your dear Mum. I am currently finding it hard, seeing her disorientated and confused.

    Well done for all the awareness raising you have (are doing) done, and well done for the care you provided for your dear Mum.

    Take care.

    Diane

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