Sunday, 19 August 2012

the reason I collect and believe in life stories ……………

I have been caring for my wee mum Joan for 5 years. Just over a year ago we nearly reached a crisis point as we struggled to cope and live,
I picked myself up best I could and decided to go out, raise awareness and try and find out how others lived and coped. It saddens me to say that most families face greater struggles than us , my campaign to collect life stories is based on my own experience on receiving a letter ,A letter that changed my life. In my previous life before dementia and caring I travelled all around the world with my job ,My long term girlfriend at the time also travelled with her job .for quite a few years my girlfriend kept trying to tell me that things had to change ,that we had to stop traveling and settle down, I had to grow up amongst other things, the more she tried to discuss this or shout or even in the most intimate of moments plead the less I heard ,I always seemed to be able to get out of talking about or discussing our future. One day as I arrived at my destination with my job I opened up my suitcase to find a letter. In that letter I read all the things my girlfriend had tried to tell me for many years ,for the first time I understood all the things she said and why we had to part My heart was broken ,but that letter told me more about my life than I ever knew before ,that why I collect letters and life stories to take to the powers that be ,I truly believe our life’s in our own words is  the best way to bring more help ,understanding and awareness. We as families and carers are best placed to describe how we live and feel we are the ones who can guide to a better future and care for all. To often I hear others speaking about dementia and caring and it bares no resemblance to how my mum the people I meet on my tour and I live and feel .A letter changed my life; our letters can change the lives of others
Please help a son and carer tell the story of living with and caring for a loved one, we have a Deputy First Minister who is listening and who I meet every three months to update on my campaign along with NHS heads who  are arranging talks based on our letters to help bring more understanding within the care sector
 Our letters have helped with reports by SW and motions at City Councils ,
Thank you  


  1. Trish HarmanAugust 19, 2012

    You're an inspiration & example to us all. God bless you sir!

  2. All stories are different. All grief is different. Commonality exists in frustration from sufferer and caregiver at the long, painful end of life.

  3. Here's my story from across the pond.

  4. And


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