Sunday morning sadness, wishing my mum was home

Hi

This house is quite a lonely house at the best times, the longer we face dementia and caring the less we see of people and the truth is it’s a lonely life for us and I believe for  far to many others. As this journey has taken its course and in many ways its toll on us, we have lost touch and contact with the outside world and even life at home has really shrunk to two rooms my mums and mine with me moving between both on a daily basis and only going downstairs to use the kitchen for food and drink in fact I have rarely sat in our sitting room over last months and just go in to dust and clean each day. with my mum being in hospital life has shrunk even more, apart from my two daily visits to the hospital I am confined to my room now and whatever my interpretation of loneliness was before has been out done by how I feel just now, my energy is low and I sit here worrying about all the small details that we put in place to comfort someone we love and care for. Even though I know my mum is being looked after at the hospital I feel quite helpless just now and struggle each time I leave after visiting as I see the look of loss on my wee mums face in fact my we mum who has said very little for months said yesterday Please take home I can’t get those three  words and her face out of my head just now and cried my self to sleep last night and sit here this Sunday morning a bit lost wishing my mum was home

Tommy